Dude, just cuil it.

cuil.com

A valid Google competitor?

Initial review:

It looks nice, it loads fast- it sucks as a search engine. I did a couple really common searches- "dog photos", "halo reviews", etc. I got a couple hits, and it does have a nice layout. I'm not used to it, so of course it's a little weird.

But, while doing these common searches, I ran into problems. One of Cuil's major advertising points is how many websites it searches, so technically it should come up with more hits for most commonly searched stuff? Well, I guess not. Because searches like "all ur base", "stuff on my cat", any huge internet meme... come up with no results. None. Nada. Nothing.

I figure, if I search for shit that is literally all over the internet in insanely annoying quantities, it'll give me a good idea at how good this site is at finding shit I actually want to find.

And Cuil? Says that in these 120 million websites claimed to be indexed, there are no phrases, websites, photos, anything oriented around dumb shit like all ur base. And now, Cuil's database appears to be unavailable.

Okay okay, granted- it's launch day of a brand new website... but they want to compete with google. Have they SEEN what happens to people who compete with google? Of course not, because you can't fucking compete with google. You can't show up on launch day not being able to find "Icanhascheezburger.com" or whatever. 

They also don't have an image search. Or maps, or any of that. I'm sorry, but in my personal opinion they probably should have developed a little bit more before they launched this. Google could afford to start purely as a website search and evolve because it was one of the first effective search engines, there was no one else out there doing the same thing, or at least not doing it nearly as well. This new website is trying to break into a market completely dominated by huge, powerful and good website. They need to prove that google isn't actually good at what it does, and they need to prove it while people are still paying attention. Which isn't looking likely.

I usually hate people for dismissing new programs or websites within hours of their creation, but for something like this I really do think it's imperative you have an outstanding first impression. They didn't even have a good introduction! There was no press, there was no advertising anywhere, and all in all it's a fairly unimpressive site. Not that at this point in time you can actually look at it- the server is down.

Awesome guys, awesome. 

ETA:

So, upon further testing, cuil.com does in fact come up with all these common internet memes... but you have to spell it exactly right. Which is sort of annoying, but understandable. Also, you'll notice that the images next to the results frequently have nothing at all to do with the results they're set next to. Which, while often hilarious, is kind of... pointless. And annoying.

Also, it comes up with LOADS of duplicate websites. There appears to be no filter on repetition. Also, their next button fails a lot.

Nitpick, nitpick.

So about how Bradford writes on this all the time...aka never-fuckin-ever

So this will be quick and short but very to the point.

Fuck. Summer. Break.

Seriously guys, have you ever heard such a thing? What kid in their right mind would say such a blasphemous comment? Well idk.....we all feel that way. All summer has done is made me severely apathetic, hhhhiiiighly (there you go landon) cynical and just plain pissed right the fuck off at the world.

Yeah, I know, you three have been harpin' on the topic throughout the blog, but again, I'm awesome, so yeah.

Becca, Landon and Fife:
I miss you all with a passion. And I know you guys are the ones with the fancy words and quick quips so I'll continue to leave that to you. I'll just end up makin a "Brad-ism" (there you becca).

I'll see Fife and Becca soon, landon in spirit and its gonna kick some insane ass

ill write more later when i feel like it

I WILL NOT BE COMING TO FIFE'S

so, I can only assume those who look at this post will know the message I am conveying here. Now, since we are past the main point, lets get into nitty gritty detail:
I have decided against coming to Fife's not for money reasons but for sleep reasons. I seem to be developing insomnia. I can only attest it to the fact I sleep between 6am and 4pm and on the days I dont work, I try to reverse it. It isn't exactly the easiest thing in the world. As a strange side effect, i find myself erecting (yes, i did say erect) fighting clubs all over the area, and splicing porn into disney movies. considering the fact I did this before insomnia though its no biggie. however, If i introduce myself as Tyler Durden to ANYONE then kill me on the spot. I prefer a knife to the back of my skull somewhere between 25 and 28 psi.
Anyways, looking at the weekend schedule from a logical standpoint, if I did go, I would be sleeping until I caught the bus friday evening at 7pm, probably sleep on the bus (because I always get tired on long car rides, no matter what. this seems to be a weakness of mine. It doesn't matter how much of a creepy necrophiliac sonofabitch the guys next to me looks on the bus, I will go down snoring, most likely waking to either a backwoods pig farm or a smattering of penis drawn across my face in permanent marker.) and after exiting the bus, get picked up by the lot of you, hanging out till the wee hours of dawn, getting awoken early to a full day of hijinks, play games late again (and dont say we wont, cause I know you all.) and then wake up early to a 11 or 11:30 bus ride home, If i am lucky enough to wake up for my stop, then I will get home, crash wake up around 3am, and not be able to fall asleep again. to put it simply, I will die.
So I pardon all your frustration at me and apologize as much as I can for nature's effects and hope to see you sometime near the beginning of school.
I also hope you have all been brushing up on your curb stomping, Cover jumping, chainsawing and 2peiceing (see BXR from Gaylo 2) for Gears of War 2 in November.
While im thinking about it, id also like to take a minute to promote Fable 2 as awesome, Mirror's Edge as potentially decent, Legendary as a phenomenally impressive idea, so lets hope it dosent shit all over itself, The force Unleashed looks extremely next generation starwars and Fallout 3 is without a doubt worth a look from everybody that plays the 360. You can play turn based, you can run and gun and play it as an fps, you get a dog named Dogmeat, you are in A REPLICATION OF WASHINGTON DC RIGHT DOWN TO THE STAIRS IN THE WASHINGTON MEMORIAL (which you can climb). Think post apocalyptic US, bullets whizzing into mutated skin as the national anthem plays. (click this link, seriously . I will be getting this game after all its downloads will be included... http://xbox360.ign.com/dor/objects/882301/fallout-3/videos/fallout3_security_071408.html


...regardless, I hope that you all are putting away those rusty old battle rifles for some new chainsaw equipped Lancers. (Also cause I assume a tourney will be had at school because gears two will be new, so what better way to brush up and take home the gold?).

Alright guys, much love. Ill end up seeing you all later this year anyways (even if we have to make it a trip while at school for you fife)

Pro-nosybastardization!

There is a movement to define contraception as abortion.

Which, personally, I think is a fabulous idea.

Probably about 70% (that's a total and complete fucking guess) of the pro-life population is really in favor of contraceptives... but not abortion. Which means if you make it abortion to PREVENT a baby, then there will be a huge number of people who are suddenly not so pro-life. Ban abortion would then = ban contraceptives and let's face it, there are little to none who want to do that. 

And, y'know, if pro-lifers stop being so insanely nosy and judgmental, suddenly it's okay to let people manage their own damn affairs! Because those same people who want to tell people they're murders for having an actual abortion don't want to be told THEY'RE murders for using condoms. Taking your own medicine is kind of like drinking your own pee. Nobody wants to do it.

And I mean, I'm not totally serious about wanting contraception to suddenly be abortion.  But I think it'd be a hilarious slap in the face for the majority of the people who think it's perfectly fine to force their personal and religious views on everybody else by telling them what they can and can't do with their lives (as trite as that sounds).

Of course, it'll never happen because everyone who is sane knows this is, well, totally insane. It's about as insane as saying masturbation is abortion. Or saying that periods are abortion... and I don't know about the rest of the girls in the world, but I don't want to spend the majority of my life starting when I'm about 11 or 12 pregnant because some overly religious fuckhead thinks nature is murder.

Anyway, obviously it's a ridiculous proposal. But here's a funny little quote from another site I'll share: 

"Man, if they're defining life as starting at conception, God is America's biggest abortion provider, considering only one out of every six fertilized eggs manages to sort itself out enough to implant and after that about a quarter of those implantations wind up in miscarriage, frequently before a woman is aware she's pregnant. That means God Himself personally takes out 87.5% of precious conceived human souls. God should be banned"

(Of course, there is somebody out there saying that it's "nature" aborting those, not God. Which is hilarious, if you think about it).

I'm also just going to use this as a forum to discuss my own personal views. 

You can say I'm pro-choice if you like, but I prefer to think I'm pro-you live your life and I'll live mine.

Are we clear? Good? What are your thoughts?

Some things you just have to share...

My dad is famous, and infamous, for many things in our family, and when he drinks he always does something that falls in one or both of these categories. For this particular story, I'm not exactly sure which it is.

We'll start off with this: My dad is allergic to red wine. This allergy manifests itself in the most impressive sneezes you have ever heard. One can stand across the road outside my house and still hear him sneeze after he's had about two glasses (this has been tested). It's really quite a feat. But tonight, he topped even that.

Here are the factors. 

· Half a bottle of red wine (consumed by the party in question)

· A linoleum bathroom floor (stood on by the party in question)

· Socks (worn by... oh you get the idea)

· Gravity and Inertia

If you can see where this is going, I'm glad. But shut up and listen anyway.  I'm sitting in my room (which is, coincidentally, right next to the bathroom. The walls are thin enough that I can hear people pee, which is weird, but I'm used to it) innocently chatting on aim, y'know, what you do. I hear my dad sneeze his way up the stairs and into the bathroom for his shower. I write this off and continue about my business... until I hear the most massive sneeze I have ever heard accompanied closely by the sounds of slipping and a gigantic BOOM. I rush to the bathroom, to confirm the inevitable. My dad was peeing, sneezed, and literally knocked himself off his feet by the power of his own sneeze, propelling him backwards onto a shower stool and thence, onto the floor.

As I entered the bathroom my dad started to insist "I'm fine I'm FINE" and refused to be helped onto his feet by me or my sister.  Yet he couldn't actually get up until my mom walked in as well and started trying to help him (I guess three women all trying to help him do something physical was just too much abuse for his manly psyche). My mom and sister must have busy watching him for signs of a cracked vertebra or tailbone (or continued stupidity), as only I noticed the gigantic, bruised abrasions gently leaking blood on the meaty part of his back (presumably where he hit the bathroom stool)... which he refused to show anyone after I attempted to point it out, resorting to backing himself into a corner and telling us to fuck off.

Anyway, the amusement pretty much ends there (except for my dad's extremely girlish squeals as my mom attempted to apply hydrogen peroxide to his wounds: "IT'S COLDIT'SCOLDIT'SCOLD make it WARM not COLD aaaahhh!") and I'm left giggling at my dad's injuries. Which I feel perfectly justified in doing, because if he refuses to acknowledge they exist I have every right to laugh at him. Also, he blamed me and my sister for the accident, by claiming we keep putting conditioner on the floor... because I mean, we always make sure to get out of the shower and stand in front of the toilet as we wash our hair. And condition the floor while we do it. It just makes it so shiny!

Actually, we actually have no conditioner in the house. Haha, Oh, father.

He's just currently taking his shower (and cursing).

I really hope this never happens to me, or I'll feel pretty stupid.

So on the Bright side of life.....

Yea, more on movie reviews, Wall-E was actually good. not amazing, not wonderful, but par. Pixar is a damn good studio and even if the movie sucks (which none they have done have, par is the worst they have done so far) the art is so pretty it counterbalances it. Some funny moments, mostly "robotic romantic" moments that are slightly humorous, and the only real downside to the movie is the main characters have the same amount of dialog as a generic pokemon. Artistically however, the movie is a brilliant at mocking the human race and where we are heading in the future, as well as corporate monopolies. So, on my scale, the movie gives me 7/10 wood. rent it, download it illegally but you might not enjoy it in the theater. If you love pixar though you might (also, the beginning short is hilarious). Also played me a little airsoft the other day.
During one very overbalanced (They Needed More Guys)match, just a friend and I surprised the hell outta the other team and took the 4 wheeler up in the woods. Talk about Mongoosing it RL-style. Yes, Halo still sucks, but it sucks less when its real...